Age(less) -A Pun Intended totally!
I bit my finger in utter surprise when Mrs. X had the gall to address Mrs. Y “Aunty” during a
conversation, while the latter bore no significant age gap. However, she showed her resentment
about keeping a mum, making her indignant annoyance obvious .
The fallacy of branding herself younger and other ones older with a negligible age gap or no gap
shook me. Such terms are kind of easy fallbacks in indian society; which at times appear not
less than a tool to yield “feel good” factor or “Abhi to main jawan hoon” feel than the portrayal of any respect. Self proclaimed youths! I got instantly reminded of a hair dye commercial flashed
during Doordarshan days which flaunted the idea of how changing the hair colour transforms
the social perception towards a lady, and overnight, turns her from being an Aunty to Didi.
At times, I wonder at the disgusting hypothesis of society to brand a lady Didi or Aunty, especially
post marriage and post delivery are sure to give you titles you never want to hear! Couple of
years ago, when I was holding my toddler in my arms, a man of 2 teenager kids pretended to be
far younger than me and left no stone unturned to render himself the title of Gabru Jawan. I
instantly retorted (of course, not out of vanity): How dare you calling me Aunty? Look at
yourself. Oh....no, no, please don’t get me wrong, personally, no aversion towards this graceful
stamp. However, the dilemma lies in its misuse or inappropriate use.
Such instances in life make me overly nostalgic; I look back into such childhood memories, I
recollect how one of my spinster whimsical relatives always insisted all my siblings and me to
address her as Didi, not Aunty. Another married Aunt of mine, almost enough old to be my
mother, assumed herself much younger; invariably greeted me “Namaste” in her
correspondence, while my 6 years old brother was quite fortunate to receive greetings for his
age.
I planned to dig deeper into the subject and came across a wonderful study done by Probal
Dasgupta with the title “The Otherness of English: India’s Auntie Tongue Syndrome, in which
author has delineated the term aunty and called it as a marker Western sophistication among
the upwardly mobile middle classes in urban and semi-urban India.” A study worth reading!
Of Late, considering sensitivity towards the title, I have almost dropped this term; reserved it
only for very dear ones who cherish being addressed like this and stick to the idea of not using
the same for other folks, replace it with rather some safer titles like Sir/Madam or no title at all,
just conversation.
Probably time to rethink and re- titling our relations.
I bit my finger in utter surprise when Mrs. X had the gall to address Mrs. Y “Aunty” during a
conversation, while the latter bore no significant age gap. However, she showed her resentment
about keeping a mum, making her indignant annoyance obvious .
The fallacy of branding herself younger and other ones older with a negligible age gap or no gap
shook me. Such terms are kind of easy fallbacks in indian society; which at times appear not
less than a tool to yield “feel good” factor or “Abhi to main jawan hoon” feel than the portrayal of any respect. Self proclaimed youths! I got instantly reminded of a hair dye commercial flashed
during Doordarshan days which flaunted the idea of how changing the hair colour transforms
the social perception towards a lady, and overnight, turns her from being an Aunty to Didi.
At times, I wonder at the disgusting hypothesis of society to brand a lady Didi or Aunty, especially
post marriage and post delivery are sure to give you titles you never want to hear! Couple of
years ago, when I was holding my toddler in my arms, a man of 2 teenager kids pretended to be
far younger than me and left no stone unturned to render himself the title of Gabru Jawan. I
instantly retorted (of course, not out of vanity): How dare you calling me Aunty? Look at
yourself. Oh....no, no, please don’t get me wrong, personally, no aversion towards this graceful
stamp. However, the dilemma lies in its misuse or inappropriate use.
Such instances in life make me overly nostalgic; I look back into such childhood memories, I
recollect how one of my spinster whimsical relatives always insisted all my siblings and me to
address her as Didi, not Aunty. Another married Aunt of mine, almost enough old to be my
mother, assumed herself much younger; invariably greeted me “Namaste” in her
correspondence, while my 6 years old brother was quite fortunate to receive greetings for his
age.
I planned to dig deeper into the subject and came across a wonderful study done by Probal
Dasgupta with the title “The Otherness of English: India’s Auntie Tongue Syndrome, in which
author has delineated the term aunty and called it as a marker Western sophistication among
the upwardly mobile middle classes in urban and semi-urban India.” A study worth reading!
Of Late, considering sensitivity towards the title, I have almost dropped this term; reserved it
only for very dear ones who cherish being addressed like this and stick to the idea of not using
the same for other folks, replace it with rather some safer titles like Sir/Madam or no title at all,
just conversation.
Probably time to rethink and re- titling our relations.
Interesting read Rajni
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